July 1, 2020
I haven’t been able to read a book and I feel like a crap pet owner ever since recent events, but I have been going back to read a lot of old stuff, which has helped in some ways.
I got reminded about how two years ago I wrote that Game Of Thrones was more than just a show to me because it always inspired me and gave me strength at times when I really needed it. Up till Season 6 anyway, and then the finale was so disappointing that I pretty much forgot about the show.
(Also lol @ how I wrote that I would never allow myself to be vulnerable again and failed miserably)
Went to the gym today (finally) to feel better and I watched Daenerys scenes again because her strength and perseverance never fails to encourage me to keep running. And it reminded me of why I was so pissed off with the finale and the ending they gave her.
I was always rooting for Daenerys. In some ways, believing in her made me believe that maybe I could be strong too despite everything. Just like her.
Despite all the crap thrown her way and everything she went through, she overcame them all. From having nothing to having everything. From losing everything to bouncing back with more than ever. A symbol of strength and courage and everything I wish I could be.
I loved watching her scenes. Until they made her go psycho within a couple of episodes, rushing through everything just because they wanted to wrap up the entire show.
I hated the ending for almost every character in the show actually, except for Theon which I thought was really well done. But everyone else deserved so much better after everything they had been through.
It just makes you wonder if you can ever really break free from the past. All it took was a few days and I find myself once again engaging in toxic and self-destructive behaviour that I thought I’d left behind. And no, I’m not talking about anything related to food or alcohol.
Anyway this is really a random post but I just wanted to write it down.