twiinklex ❤

Bad decisions make good stories. And I always have a good story.

Notes to self

– Time is the ultimate truth-teller.

– It is so hard to leave — until you leave. And then it is the easiest goddamned thing in the world.

– How they treat you is how they feel about you.

– But also how people treat you is a reflection of themselves, not you.

– This too shall pass.

Honestly I did wonder if maybe I just suck or am weak/lousy, and that’s why I’m having trouble adjusting. But it’s not an adjustment issue and I should stop talking down to myself. I know I am competent and have always delivered – just ask anyone or take a look at my consistently strong grading every year.

But you can only try and fight for something so much before you feel utterly defeated and see no point in continuing to put in effort. I think this applies to everything in life, whether work or relationships. For me, what comes next is silence and detachment and finally goodbye.

Trying very hard to not care, bare minimum, let it wash all over me, be my happy self. I’ll admit it’s difficult though, especially since I’m emotional and hence instinctively reactive, and the all-or-nothing, no half-assery kind.

But when you do not feel valued, you do not feel heard, the only thing to do is to leave.

And I’m talking about more than just one thing but it’s kinda messed up how intertwined they are.

November + December highlights

Super overdue but still. Probably the most whirlwind and hectic months I’ve had all year with so much going on back to back (no wonder I crashed and burn the last few days of the year lol), but I also had SOOO much fun and I wanna log it all down here.

♡ Pinkmas @ Museum of Ice Cream: I’m surprised by how much I enjoyed this because it’s not something I would go for outside of work, but #jobperks. Brought my mum and we had so much fun goofing around. Definitely one of those events where who you go with makes a huge difference.

PR side was also super happy with the article so yay.

♡ 1 tasting: Loved how Farah and I made a whole day out of this. Food was good, then we went to Starbucks to publish stories. It’s one of those more spacious outlets with great natural lighting and an airy feel, so very conducive. I even got to enjoy two drinks as the barista made my order wrongly 😛 We were super productive and got a lot done! Then indulged in a shiok dinner because #self-care 😏

♡ 2 book launches: One for Bookstagram (very chuffed to be invited despite how I’m barely active!!) and one for work. Got signed copies of both authors’ books too 🙏🙏 However I realised I’d still prefer to keep work and hobbies separate,,,

♡ 1 wedding: Caryn had a coffeeshop wedding and I decided to dress more towards ‘wedding’ than ‘coffeeshop’ because duh. It’s super funny cos the moment I reached and saw her attire, I said ‘fuck’ and you can hear her exclaiming to other people that she was in just a t-shirt and shorts 😂😂😂

I love how casual it all was though, with a buffet (this ST guy was shocked at how much I ate and even mentioned the Bangkok bingeing he saw on my IG stories to Farah 🙄).

♡ 5 movie screenings: The Marvels (meh), Death Whisperer (not bad), Wonka (this was surprisingly good and wholesome and they went all out for the premiere so we even got snacks and merch), Undertaker (so horrible that I decided not to write a review because I have nothing positive to say), Aquaman (fun).

Actually I prefer watching movies in bed unless it’s something I’m dying to see e.g. Barbieheimer, but I RSVP because it’s a good break from writing news (plus a chance to go explore new food places hehe) and also I feel like it would be a nice treat for my +1, if any.

What can I say… PR peeps love me 😉 jkjk

♡ Taiwan: Super unexpected but I was delighted to be asked. I’d already gone on two very luxe work trips so it’s not even my turn. No wonder Ali says I always get all the fun stuff at work 😂 But I also do feel that I’m deserving of them all because have you seen how hard I work!!

Our hosts were super kind and generous, and everyone took such good care of us 🥺 Maureen and I got on like a house on fire LOL didn’t feel like I was travelling with my supervisor at all 😂😂😂

Definitely a month of blessings because I felt like I was gifted many things whether it was through lucky draws or Christmas presents or memorable experiences. There were also spillover birthday celebrations with people I didn’t get to see in October so I tried a lot of yummy new food places, but this post will never see the light of day if I list them all 😛

I wonder why I got so many looks wearing the right-side outfit at the mall… (lol not really 🤣)

What stood out for me most though was all the FANGIRLING. I used to be on Tumblr all the time, making gifs, reblogging posts about my favourite shows and movies, writing theories and essays, reading fanfiction. Then life got in the way, But it’s like that part of me never died or disappeared, it was just lying dormant this whole time. Until now and suddenly it’s all back in full force.

♡ Taylor Swift’s The Eras Tour movie: Went with Farah and it was a wonderful experience (like a mini concert). I even dressed up according to the Lover album (it seemed the easiest). I would have watched it again but the ticket is $20 and all it includes is a little poster… still worth it for one time though 🤭

♡ ZoukOut: was so amazing that I already wrote a whole post about it.

♡ The Ballad Of Songbirds And Snakes: I watched this alone in theatres, not once but twice 😝 I was determined to finish the book before seeing the movie and both are incredible! Still not over all the references and Easter eggs and parallels, the final scene and the final chapter and the final line. Ahhh!!!!

♡ Suits: Felt kinda blue the last few days of 2023, then I remembered how happy fangirling always made me so I marathoned the last season. And it did the trick because it not only made me laugh and cry and all the usual fangirl things, it also I felt like the show was speaking to me. All in all, an excellent show.

Strange to think the last few days of 2023 weren’t so great as January has been insanely good. I’m seriously living out my fangirl fantasies because guess who just watched Coldplay on opening night???? All I have to say for now is OMG…