April 3, 2015
2015 has been a year of thoughtless yolo moments and reckless decisions, at times accompanied by regret and self-loathing. You would think that at the age of 21, I’d start having more sense but noooope. Getting real tired of my shit actually.
If you are here to preach or judge, please save your breath and go away. Logically I know everything e.g. don’t drink so much blah blah but applying what you know is another thing altogether. Everyone knows that we shouldn’t steal and that murder is wrong but people still commit crimes, ok?
I dyed my hair on Monday but instead of sharing photos of my hair, I’m going to show you pictures of my teeth 🙁 This time yesterday, I had all my teeth intact and could smile normally… yeah yeah eye bags because I slept 4 hours.
Was at Ling Yue’s birthday party with Clement and Darren. I was tipsy from vodka quite early on but didn’t stop. We made a toast to Ling Yue and downed our drinks in one swift gulp. One drink became two and so on. Downed even more cups with her boyfriend and I stopped bothering with mixers.
I don’t remember anything that happened after that, other than the impact of my fall on the ground. All I saw was black and nothingness the whole time, but I remember a sudden sharp ache on my teeth. Don’t even know where the fuck I fell. Indoors or outdoors? I’ll find out next time.
Apparently I threw up, was shouting and crying (Why?? Pretty sure I was in a good mood), and went into the swimming pool as well. Someone called me dad who came to get me… ugh worst option ever. Now my whole family knows zzzz.
My next memory is of me at home and getting into bed. Don’t even recall the ride home. Woke up at 6am this morning and remembered the ache on my teeth. Kinda knew what to expect, I guess. Checked my reflection and sure enough.
My front tooth fucking chipped off what the fuck… I am not in the mood to take a full selfie to do a before-after comparison. As if my self-esteem needs more battering. My teeth were already not nice to begin with. Time to stop smiling.
Sigh why can’t teeth heal and regenerate like our other body parts? Hopefully a dentist can work his magic and make the chip less obvious. If not, it will just serve as a permanent reminder of my stupidity and foolishness. Which I completely deserve.
I guess it could always be worse. I could have blinded myself, gotten a permanently crooked nose or a huge scar across my face. First thing I saw on my Facebook feed after seeing my teeth was this:
Woke up with worst headache ever as well. Fuck everything. I’m someone who needs to learn her lesson the hard way before I’ll get it. That’s what I always tell my friends.
As unbelievable as it sounds, I don’t drink a lot or all the time. It’s just that lately, I have been lacking more self-control than usual. Have only passed out drunk three times including yesterday and they all happened quite recently. At least I *finally* learned.
The previous time was earlier in January at Amos’s house with Yixuan and Linus.
I wish it was just this bottle of Barcadi (tastes like crap haha) that the four of us finished but nope. We made our own Jagerbombs by mixing Redbull and Jagermeister. Same thing, I was on a spree and everyone else tried to stop me but I wasn’t having any of it.
Was actually feeling super down then I started telling the rest about what’s going on before bursting into tears. It went downhill from there. I went all psycho and didn’t stop crying for hours. That’s all I remember, everything else I heard from the rest.
Was making such a din in wee hours of the morning that a neighbour threatened to call the police. In the earlier post, I said “I’m surprised I didn’t insist on jumping off the block” which was wrong because I just found out from Yixuan last week that I did try to -_-
I did eventually quieten down and slept it all off. Made it home in the morning with my family none the wiser. I think my mum suspected what happened though. Plus she nearly called the cops too because she thought something had happened to me, since I stayed out all night without telling her.
I am a fucking terrible human being what the fuck.
Before this, it was when I visited Hong Kong for the first time last November. Went to the famed Lan Kwai Fong district on a Friday night which is like our Clarke Quay, but a hundred times livelier.
I was really happy and life was marvellous then. Plus I was overseas and hence twice as yolo. Bar-hopped, ordered lots of cocktails and did plenty of shots.
Not much damage done, thankfully. Does the mood I am in really make a difference? All I did was giggle and laugh a lot, dance with a random stranger and I think that’s about it. At least I remembered the ride home before KO-ing in my hotel bed.
No wait, I did do something stupid… I meant to WhatsApp just one person and being tired, used the ‘record audio’ function to talk instead of type. The messages ended up all over the place to at least five different chats, none of which were the intended recipient.
OMFG OK SO I GOT BLOODY WASTED AT LAN KWAI FONG ON FRIDAY NIGHT AND ENDED UP DRUNK TEXTING IN AT LEAST 5 DIFFERENT WHATSAPP CHATS
— Cherlynn (@twiinklex) November 18, 2014
INCLUDING AUDIO CLIPS OF ME YELLING. I APOLOGISED TO EVERYONE (THANK GOD THEY WERE ALL MY CLOSE FRIENDS) AND THOUGHT THAT WAS IT.
— Cherlynn (@twiinklex) November 18, 2014
JUST LEARNT THAT SOMEHOW MY EDITOR FOUND OUT ABOUT IT AND TOLD EVERYONE AND THAT THEY WERE PLAYING THE CLIPS IN OFFICE TODAY WTF WELP — Cherlynn (@twiinklex) November 18, 2014
I AM NOT IN TROUBLE BUT I WILL NEVER HEAR THE END OF IT BECAUSE HE NEVER PASSES A CHANCE TO MAKE FUN OF ME OH GOD WHY — Cherlynn (@twiinklex) November 18, 2014
Only Kumar and Noor got the audio clips (I was just yelling about being tired) but Azhar (aka the whole office) overheard them talking about it. Lol they are never going to let me live it down.
I KNEW SOMEONE WAS GOING TO SAY THIS EVEN BEFORE ANYONE REPLIED WTF.
Ok whatever, I’m swearing off hard liquor forever. Never again!!! The aftermath of pain and confusion is so not worth it. And now I’m disfigured too. Not sure why my friends even bother with me and the crap I put them through. What the fuck was I thinking?